A few years ago, my sister Josephine wrote a blog called, “How to Be a Poodle.” It’s time for me to tell the world that poodles are nothing like chihuahuas. Mind you, there is nothing wrong with being a poodle. The world needs poodles and Rottweilers and all kinds of canine personalities. But, while poodles benefit from a centuries old perception of prissiness and superiority, chihuahuas have to prove their worth every day. We are pretty much always on our guard. Have you ever seen a chihuahua with a bow in his or her hair? No way, Jose. Have you ever seen a chihuahua allow a stranger to sit next to his or her human without a nuclear outburst of indignation ? NO! Not unless that chihuahua was half-dead or drunk. No, chihuahuas don’t care if you think they are pretty. And chihuahuas are jealous creatures, ever ready to dare an interloper to a vicious fight. Chihuahuas are noble souls, brave to a point but not ridiculous about it if there’s a mouse in the house, loyal to a fault unless they lose interest, and more opinionated than a Fox news reporter. The heart of a chihuahua is pure but not naive. Chihuahuas worry a lot… mostly about their own welfare. But, if you have a chihuahua for a best friend, then you know you have the best bed buddy in the world, a constant companion, and an uncritical partner who thinks you smell good all the time. We should all aspire to have a little chihuahua in our spirit. So, if you want to be a chihuahua, here are the life skills you must master.